Life can be a whirlwind of emotions and challenges, often leaving us searching for answers and solutions on the outside.
Many of us have found ourselves in situations where we point the finger at external factors, blaming our jobs, other people, our circumstances for our feelings. It’s a natural response, but as I discovered, it’s a place that takes us out of our power.
In this blog, I share my personal journey from blaming external factors to realising the profound impact of our thoughts on our feelings and overall well-being.
🔎 The Blame Game
I used to be caught in the vicious cycle of blaming everything around me for my inner struggles.
Living in the bustling metropolis of London, at the time, I often found myself overwhelmed and anxious. My stressful job, endless to-do lists, and my circumstances (being single) all seemed like convenient scapegoats for my inner struggles. It’s easy to think that changing these external elements will bring us lasting happiness and peace. However, I learned the hard way that this is not always the case.
🌍 A Change of Scenery
In search of a fresh start, I made a significant move to Cape Town, South Africa. The allure of a new exciting environment and 10 months of sunshine was undeniable.
I thought that by changing my surroundings, I would finally find the happiness and inner calm I had been looking for. While the change did bring some incredible experiences, it didn’t take long for me to realise that something deeper was still amiss.
💡 The Aha Moment
My transformative journey truly began during a retreat in South Africa, far away from the hustle and bustle of Cape Town and my daily life. Giving myself space form my life, it was there that I had a profound insight; almost an awakening from within.
I discovered a truth that completely shifted my perspective. I realised that all those years in London, it wasn’t the city, the job, or my circumstances causing my unhappiness. It was my ‘thoughts’, about those things, that created how I was feeling.
💭 The Power of Thoughts
My revelation was that my thoughts were the architects of my feelings. Negative, worrisome, and fearful thoughts about my work, finances, and my life situation were the real culprits behind my inner wellbeing struggles. I had been mistakenly attributing my feelings to external factors when, in reality, it was the internal dialogue I had with myself that was shaping my reality.
🚫 Thoughts Aren’t Facts
The second insight that profoundly impacted me was the understanding that thoughts are just thoughts; they aren’t facts!
We often fall into the trap of automatically believing our negative thoughts, especially those about ourselves. These thoughts can lead to low self-esteem and confidence and a distorted self-image. But the truth is, those thoughts are not accurate representations of reality.
🔄 Challenging Our Beliefs
It’s common for these negative thoughts to become deeply ingrained beliefs. When we repeatedly think a particular thought, it becomes a belief, and that belief becomes the lens through which we view the world. We start living our lives according to these false beliefs, and it can be challenging to break free from this cycle.
A Shift in Perspective ✨
The real power lies in recognising that our thoughts create our feelings, and our feelings shape our entire life experience.
When we distance ourselves from our thoughts, viewing them as passing clouds, rather than unshakable truths, we gain a new perspective. This shift can significantly impact how we feel and how we perceive the world around us.
My journey from blaming external factors for my anxiety and unhappiness to realising the power of my thoughts has been transformative. It’s a journey that has allowed me to reclaim my true inner confidence, and take charge of my emotional well-being. It has allowed me to step into my true personal power.
I invite you to reflect on your own life and consider whether you might be giving too much power to negative thoughts that don’t serve you.
Remember, thoughts are just thoughts, and by changing the way we think, we can change the way we feel and experience the world.
Deepening your understanding to these insights, you’ll find the key to a happier and more fulfilling life.
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